China11 Sep 2010 02:44 pm
Since there is nothing important, new and world moving to report on at the moment it’s back to reporting on the old and the mundane.
So Straight in at number five: have you seen the size of the mangos in this place? And how thin the stone is once you’ve scraped off all the flesh – yum! Got to love the fruit in this place.
At number four: taking the idea of rock suggar a little too far!
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Put that in your tea for a little sweetness. And mind the spillage! Kapow!
At number three: I call it ‘healthy eating in China’. MSG, also called ‘gourmet powder’ (are you having a laugh!?) available in all good supermarkets for you to own in handy 25kg bags for only 400 something something Rmb.
At number two: oh look it’s moon cake time again – mmmmm!
And finally at number one: have you seen my new couch covers? So I leave my flat for the summer thinking nothing bad, return and my couch looks like a big fat gold polyester monster has thrown up all of it’s bad taste all over it. Even think about a match and the whole thing goes up in flames. Delightful!! Sit on in for more than a second and besides the itching your hair stands up in all directions from all the static.
“>There’s really only one remedy. Well two actually. Embrace the little monster’s puke by matching red velvet (but very very cheap so as not to spoil the look) heart shaped cushions with it. Or two: rip the horror off the couch and start breathing again normally. Guess which option I went for!? That;s right … take deep breaths … it’ll all be OK.
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